To Blend In

Sometimes, it might be nice to just fade into unnoticeability. 

To be one of the boxes and not stand out in any way must feel relieving. 

It would be perhaps respite from the chaos of our living to just be that one unopened box on the back row. Good job, Mr. Tiggs, reminding me what is real.

 

My Ugly American Evolution

Kuwait is an interesting place.
It is a juxtaposition of old ideas and ideals with modern ones and a stark contrast of western and middle eastern flavors.

And as with any place, the flavors and impressions you get from it are colored by the people with whom you sit or surround yourself.
As one could probably note by picking up from my initial posts on this blog, my evolution was definitely impacted by time and  people.

I suppose, just like with my evolving appreciation for Arabic coffee, when the natural tendency to compare and contrast dies away, the distilled pictures come into focus and it becomes easier to take in unique qualities that stand alone. It was when I kept attempting Arabic coffee with my American definition and understanding of it, that I did not like it. But when I took it on as something completely different, and no longer held it up to be measured with my cultural yardstick, I found I really enjoyed it.

Kuwait is like that for me too.

I know I made mistakes when I was first here in trying to see how this or that was similar, different, better, worse than what I have always known. But that was not fair. It is, as we say, being the 'Ugly American.' And it is truly ugly and arrogant to go to other places and cultures with the notion that they must somehow be held up to anything else. It is in the letting go of a culturally inculcated and nurtured idea that 'America is number 1' and everybody else must want and be like America to be worthy, where appreciation and real growth take place.

It is also in this letting go, that the idea of being a 'global citizen' makes sense. We are no more tied to place or belong to place than a migratory bird is. We have the ability, not always the freedom, to pick up and move to another continent, country, state. And in doing so, we start to see ourselves  and world anew. We see that we have cultural trappings and ideas, but they can be changed to allow for other understandings and ways of seeing, and with those eyes, comes the ability to not only live and let live, but also to understand, evolve, and love.

Bored in Life?

'I'm bored.' 

It is a common complaint, curiously, most mumbled by children and teens.

Why?

Ever wonder why it is not a common complaint among adults?

Well, I'll only speak from my experience of course.

As an adult, I have found that those moments of 'boredom' were in fact luxury items of youth.
My mother used to tell me that only boring people get bored.
There is some truth there.
But not what I imagined she meant at that time.
As an adult, I realize that now, unfortunately, most of our time is relegated to obligation and routine. We rush about our days always feeling that there is not enough time to get it all accomplished.

Boredom? Who has time for that?

And maybe, if we are lucky, there is some slight respite which gives us long enough pause to realize that it was in those moments of boredom where we actually were able to connect- be that connection with ourselves, family, or the world around. It is in those moments of distilled silence that we are able to find ourselves-meet ourselves stripped bare of distraction. And looking back on those moments, I realize, is it not ironic that I can actually remember them specifically? For if they were indeed moments of boredom, moments of nothingness, would they be able to hold space in my memory banks at all?
The true answer to that is no.
There must be wisdom, be peace, be truth, be me in those moments. It must be in those moments where I found little bits of myself.
And so, as an adult, who now appreciates and longs for those boring moments, I realize their worth, and I seek ways to be bored again.

All the Noise, Noise, Noise...

Kuwait is a city, (you'd be surprised at how many folks back where I come from don't know this already, but hey, can't blame them) and as such, it is full of sights, sounds, smells, etc. City living can become taxing for all of us on physical levels whatever city we live in, and it's often impossible to fully be cleansed of its insult on our senses. Of course it's easier to block out visual disturbances, but auditory ones are much more difficult. Over time, we become numb to the noise around us, both within and without. Traffic, people, electronics, and mind chatter fill our ears, fill our thoughts, fill our energy, and block us from being fully present and positive.
At times like these, when I am feeling full and overwhelmed, I will remove myself and allow myself some moments of quiet. Other times, I find some Solfeggio frequency 'music' to be healing.
The link above is the 528 Hz frequency and has the reputation for creating amazing transformation and miracles. It’s even been linked to the repair of human DNA, but what I know to be true of it is that it is very calming and soothing. 
Try it out.

Kuwait/ America/ Kenya/ Japan/ Vantage Points

Living in a country other than your own affords you a unique perspective.
You become acutely aware of the window. Daily, you begin to notice that there are others looking through that same window.
And then, you are shocked to see that everyone is peering through it.
But, over time, you slowly start to get that although we are all viewing the same sights, we each have a different perspective from our standing spots and heights.
And then a very mellowing, calming acceptance builds within.
Yes, we are different-viewing sights from unique perspectives and vantage points, with our own individual storied histories, but while we are viewing it separately,
we are at the exact moment, standing inside the same house.

Are We Awake Yet?

We are waking up slowly.
We are waking up.
We are waking.
We are slow.
We are.
We.

This morning in Kuwait, am I hopeful we are collectively waking?
Yes.
Have I allowed my energy and feelings to attach to that hope?
Hopefully not.
This morning in Kuwait,
I am.
It is enough to be that me in the we that is slowly
waking.

It's Friday in Kuwait- Saturday/Sunday too.

Today is Friday.

Friday here is like the Sunday in the US, in that it is the congregational prayer day, but not, in that there is still another day of the weekend following, so it's also like the Saturday.

Not too much happening right now, which is what I have grown to relish. When I was younger, I wanted to go, do, see and be seen. Well, it's almost the opposite now. I want to stay, relax, hide away and be quiet. Funny that.

So Friday suits me well. A day of repose, a day to be contemplative, a day of approved removal.

Has anyone else noted a desire to remove themselves from the chaos that is our modern times? I have purposely not watched news sources, nor scrolled through sites that would bring me face to face with the ugliness. It's truly hard to bounce back from the negativity of current events and tendencies.

I find that being in a small country that is fairly uninvolved feels right. It's kind of like being with that person at the party who doesn't take sides when two popular folks start to go at each other. It's so nice to be with that person who pulls you away and says, you can hang with me and just avoid taking sides or being drug in.

Oh, I will be forced out of reclusiveness shortly. I will be a part of family Friday too. I will go out for Family Friday Dinner, and I will chat, observe, and relish the energy that comes along with as well. For as much as I desire to be removed, I also desire to belong, to connect. And I suppose, if I am honest with myself, the act of creating, writing, blogging, etc. are all ways of reaching out for connection too.

But,

they are way of reaching out to connect with a safety net. A way of screening and vetting with whom I will connect, and how much connection is warranted.

Funny world we find ourselves in: longing for quiet, seeking escape, holding at arms' length, and yet, finding community in prayer, in family, in friends, in creation,
in Friday.